Omar Samad

OK, so Was just having a lil time to myself after rolling through 4 episodes of Battle Star Galactica tonite, season 4 !! man, i was in tears for lots of parts in it !!! heheh before i get side tracked, i just want to drop a note about what actually motivated me tonite to write about it.

So about actually 1 week ago, there was a very favourite Prog House, Trance dj that came to Toronto, and omg was so there, got dropped off by my sister, and omg was rocking out all fuckn night! it was just magical too btw, like i havent been moved like that for a while and to feel such a  beautifull orchestration of music and energy was just an experience of a life-time. BUT the single thing that made me smile looking back tonite was !!! ok when i was walking back to the coat check to get my jacket, someone put their arm on my shoulder and i turned around and the guy said to me ‘Man you are such a good dancer’ . I was really so happy to hear that! it honestly made my day, and I thanked him and then peaced out.

So I tried calling my buddie Gem, who lived only a few blocks away, was gonna crash pad over there, but he didnt pick up for some reason, and LUCKY ME! that i found some people going to Missisauga and some how managed to swing a free ride back home, so like i still had to wake up Aunty Helen, but she’s always kool ;0

Oh btw, it was Hernan Cattaneo.

im just thinking to myself, all my loved ones havent heard from me in a while and i thought i would say hello.

I started off saying hello to an old friend, she was very happy to see me and made me feel so cozy again. shortly after I could hear the rain coming down, so i decided to go for a walk, and getting about to the end of my street i thought to myself.. why am i walking lets ride!!

I ran back home to grab my bike, and booked it over to the creek. I drove in the main gate, one of the rare times i have but now that i have a membership it rocks!! i

Just as i was pulling up to a set of picnic tables just off to the side, opened up a rather large field that absolutely lit up completly by a sharp bolt of lightnign right in front of me!! i dropped my bike off and climbed up onto the table for a while, reaching for my bag i grabbed my water and just stood there for a minute just watching the night sky.

A strong gust of wind came along and gave me the signal to move on, and onwards I rode. what an incredible sensation it started to rain, only drops came but it was enough to let me feel it.

Next I came up to the shore line, an elder tree agreed to watch over my bike if i would return one day and tell him about how the world has been changing. He showed me his three children and just as it turns out they were watching the night sky also. I sat down beside the youngest of the 3 and we were so engrossed into watching the night sky shine bright with light, that it was the entire universe. I returned back to the elder and pulled out a snack, i packed a grape fruit earlier and omfg was it evar delicous, it was the most lucious juicy fruit that ive ever had in my life. i sat down on the ground emcompassed by the warmth of the elder i was rejuvinated from the cooler temperature, and I enjoyed that grapefruit so much, i worked my way down to about 1/2 of the fruit left, and i broke it in half. A little snack for someone i thought to myself as i dug a lil hole in the ground and put my peels away.

the sky was lit up with colours that will only ever exist in that moment of time. The wind returned to guide me as it again was time to ride on.

oh k btw, just figured out that computrer problem (xp) i found an old ide kicking around and slotted her in.

I was being engulfed by the forest as I carried on my journey and it was just amazing to feel the energy like that at that moment. I was completley in the heart of the woods now, and I took a stop to meditate here and absorb, resonate with the earth as much as i could.

it was pooring rain down so hard at this point, it was incredible i was just sitting there and not even getting that much wet, pure bliss.

The rain stopped and i knew it was time to go from here. I continued on, and shortly after i came to a clearing that was well light up by the sky. I needed to take a pit stop, and nows my chance i thought, i pulled up beside a tree and started to let it drizzle out. A sharp snap of a twig caught my attention and the sounds of little footsteps coming towards me made me feel a lil funny.

I was still firehosing away and was not ready to stop yet, but the footsteps were closer and closer, and finally i could see it what I was fearing .. the penetrating white lines of hair on black. A skunk, im not really too familiar with behaviour patterns for them but this one was coming closer and closer to me, I made out a shhhhhh’ing sound to try and scare him off, but he started to circle me in a 2m radius ok finally im done pissing!! yes, i grabbed my bag and hopped on my bike fast i couldnt get my pack around my shoulder and it swun back down towards my handle bars, fuck the strap is caught in the wheel as im frantically pedalling away, FUCK the skunk is charging at me as i look back,,k after a nightmare few seconds of trying to get my strap out of my wheel, as the skunk is barrelling down the path at me its only 1m away and i can see its eyes glowing. Finally my strap breaks free of the wheel, with one swift motion i swung my bag over my shoulder mounted my bike and rode off into the woods. before the skunk got me.

wow what a rush, obviously i was creeping in on his home and taking a piss at his tree he prolly wasnt too happy with the idea of someone moving in on his terrotory but whew, it made me laugh so hard after that i was tripping so hard about not getting sprayed by him.

I carried on my way. and for a good while i just biked, no direction or aims, just rode through the darkness as a king and his horse. the woods guided me to the exit and i made my way to the street, i was just crossing the street when i saw a pretty big frog down below, i immediately parked my bike to the side and watched him, i thought to myself id love to hold him, but then part of me thought that would scare him, i watched his throat bulge up and down as he sat there, and as i approached he stopped. BUt at this point i decided that he can feel the energy around him and know there is no dager from me, i grabbed for him, he slipped right through my hands the first couple of grabs but i got him this time,kneeling on the ground i opened up my hand and he jumped right out. My warrior instincts took over at this point and i grabbed him again , and this timei raised my hands up to my eye level, and then i released my grip on him. Excactly as i thought he wouldnt jump out becuase we’re too high, i told him i was sorry for disturbing his peace but i wanted to to touch him. he was responsless to me, and he made me laugh as i knew he wasnt going to budge., I lowered my hands to the ground and he stayed there for a sec, and then with one big leap he jumped into the bushes, off to share his encounter with me to his companions.

I eventually returned to my home, and started to trouble shoot my dads vpn problem, time is running out and i gave my word that i would fix it. Im happy to report that the xp install is about 90^ done now, and the xplite seed worked like a charm, on that spare ide drive that i found kicking. and its like 7:00 now everything working perfect dad is actually eating breaky and lookin foward to a stable VPN.

Love to Live

zen

There are many ways to explain what zen is and before I experienced it I had a pretty sound explanation, now I know it means nothing.
I just returned from the Anataji Monestary which was a 4km hike into the mountains of Hamasaka, what an amazing place, I just wish I had more time to spend with the monks there. I was there for 2.5 days, but every moment added to the experience of a lifetime. Lucky to find one of the rare Zen temples that accept foriegners the head monk here was actually a foriegner.

The stairs.. after reaching the top of the mountain, which was one of the most beautifull hikes in my life, I came to a giant stairway of stone, that led upwards even more so. I couldnt get over the spectacular beauty of the place, I met this Japanese girl on the bus and she also was on her way to stay a few days. We were greeted by some friendly faces in the kitchen area when we first arrived. Got the tour and setup our quarters for the time being. There was 8 people in total, and interestingly enough many of them spoke english, however it didnt really matter much as there was no talking unnecessarily during the whole duration of when i was there.

03:45 was the wake up call for morning saZen (silent sitting). There was a monk running up and down the hall waving a bell, and it was almost like part of my dream waking up ina black room hearing this sound and footsteps, especially in such a foriegn place. saZen started at 04:00 we silently filed into the hall and then we took our place for meditation. I was uncomfortablefor the last part of the hour some tightness in my hips were controlling my thoughts, and I was consumed. there was a 15min walking meditation which was like the slowest walk you could ever imagine, a half a step every 4-5s .. after this, and then we followed that by another 45minutes of saZen which was much better. “STOP IT” yelled the docho-san which scared me so much, and pretty sure evryone else, it was like a slap in the face to wakeup, he was yelling at this one guy that was yawning during the walking meditation steps and i remember that clearly cuz i was looking right at him while he was yawning.lol

Initially I was still in awe, and never felt my seat of power during each of these sittings, and we broke up for breakfast. Now also when we conduct ourselves in the Monestary there is no talking at all, unless its a relative question. and most of the time we could easily follow suit to what others do as that is the way of Zen, to be aware of the surroundings .. to be aware of everything. Meals was like a race, there was a strict code of ettiquette that must be followed, from placing the chopsticks over the miso soup bowl, to the positioning of all the bowls in front of you. and it was imperative that everything must be followed. and how u sat. the chants done before and after every meal, and especialy when there was no snacking in between, and from the hard work inbetween the aura that was created while we waited and chanted reminded myself of how fortunate we are to have this food to eat, this water to drink. The monks that live here grow everything themselves, they have no money for personal possessions, or anything else, they just exist to swim in the wonderfull bliss that life is, right in the heart of the earth away from the maddening cities and tucked away from destructive power of humans .. for now. It was a magical place.

We were all assigned work, and I was paired up with the girls, Tomoyo-san, and Shinako-san. I dont know why but .. it always seems im paired up with girls naturally.. lucky me!!
our task for the morning was to chop firewood for the kitchen, which was small. So we made our way to the barn where the wood was, and we began. At first I was struggling with it using a strange technique I didnt have the flow. The monk came up to me grabbed the axe, and put a new piece of wood up, and showed me. Nara ho di neigh (I understand) I said to myself, and he made his way to continue on with what he had to do. I instantly found the hand of zen, as I watched myself do the rest, and it became a meditation as we silently worked on chopping and placing the wood up on the shelf, we had a tea break, and a lunch break, the lunch break was informal, and we were allowed to eat in the kitchen and not the dining room, however being such a beautifull day I decided to eat outside suprisingly I was the only one who wanted to eat outside which was fine by me, and what a fantastic idea as per usual, I lost the track of time, just being amazed at how beautifull it was up there, there was a distant sound of water coming from the nearby moutain stream. So back into the hall for instructions, this time we were set to harvest buckwheat and Atzuki (sweet beans). Which was so fun, under the blazing sun I went inside to get one of those Trinangle hats and it felt so kool!! like those hats are so good for keeping the sun off, and made me feel like jubei .. kibagami jubei. hehe and again while we worked in silence I found the mind of zen as the work became timeless and a pleasure to be of service.

15:00 officially done work, and time for showering, now this time, waking up so early in the day, kinda played off with my bodys schedule and I didnt have time to take a proper shit, so I wasnt feeling that good about it now, and decided to get it out, I did some yoga thats designed to get it all out and things started moving!! and shortly after took a nice hot shower, and wow just feeling amazing now!! We soon after ate. And this was an intesne meal, I mean, after working all day, we built up somewhat of a hunger for this, and when it came time to chant before we ate, to thank the universe for allowing us to eat, really resonated with me and I could feel the aura around me amoung everyone, the paitence we endured, and then finally .. Ikadakimass !! (Something like lets begin this meal together) after the meal and at the evening tea ceremony I announced that it was a honour to be welcomed into their house and to learn their way of life, and it was my final night here.

An hour and a half later, we began the evening saZen and this is where it got interesting to me, part of the way of zen in saZen is that you sit with your eyes open, and it was different to me, and finally it sat with me .. im not sure about when it was time wise, but I remember just looking at the wall and in my peripheral vision I could swear the lights were dimming and returning to normal, .. I didnt move a CM to check, but I could still see this.. wierd, and then also what was even more interesting I started to hallucinate .. yes thats right, i could see a pair of pants in the wall in front of me .. and there was a pattern of leaves that were around the crotch area.. and they were waving slightly .. like regardless ive felt this sensation before through meditation and it was amazing to be reminded of it once again, I had to close my eyes now to be sure of it, but I did, and wow.. it was there. those colourfull shapes and patterns you see when you take magic mushrooms.. (from what i hear anyways) wow, it still amazes me thinking about it, and I couldnt stop smiling now, this was it.. my seat of power is what I call it also I had tears streaming down my face, my awareness was back at one with every part of my being, I could see everything so clear, and bearing witness to all the love that exists in my life, the people around me, the connection I have with people, the energy in this room, that poor little boy and his family that I sponsor, the faces of time that paved the footsteps in my life. Shortly after .. the sound of the meditation bell rang, and it was time to leave the hall and prepare for bed. wow was it really over??! Honestly it didnt feel like it had been an hour, and I was left with this feeling .. I couldnt stop smiling, and I went into the kitchen for a cup of sencha and then I was outside under the stars..

wow, it was truly incredible out here, just as amazing as it ever had been in my life. we were on a 4km high mountain, so i wrapped myself up in a blanket or 2, and layed there with my tea. Then there it was!! it wasnt the biggest one ive ever seen, that was actually in Australia when me and Karryn were laying there looking at them, im still sad that she didnt see it at the same time, but this night, hehe was ahlg 3/4 that size and that is pretty big so prolly like 6 or 7 dots of stars connected to make a line, thats how big, pretty big eh?!!? after my tea I retired to my room. and stayed for my final night.

The mysteries of Zen revealed themselves to me during my time there. faces of the nameless monks that vibrated throughout the universe as I stepped into their path.. it was a very profound reason that I was here with them, it all was meant to be. I remember on my journey up I was worried abit that I had taken a wrong bus, and I did actually so I was behind schedule by 45min .. but I remember saying to myself that if it was meant to be it will be. and truly it was. The time there didnt give me a chance to think about anything. the time gave me the chance to remember that nothing really matters .. everything that really exists is a preception of

The train from Tokyo was a snap, 2h 45min, on a bullet train, I wasnt sure if it was a bullet train when I stepped on board, but I remember looking out the window and was just like ‘omg thats fast’. So getting to Kyoto is where I switched up to the Nara train line, and it was another 60min to get to Nara, I picked up a map from the booth I saw over on the counter, and was on my way to Yoan Cafe. So already I was sayin to myself how much of a fool I was for packing so heavy, but regardless of that I came up with a great idea of attaching the bag to my backpack with a rope, so i can just pull it! and omg made the walk so much better. So I was happy! so happy, and just walking up one of the main streets on the way, just wow, I couldnt wipe the smile off my face at all now! I was greeted with warm smiles and friendly faces all the way to the cafe! There was an old couple that were pointing out to my bag and laughing I turned around and laughed with them, and was waved them bye. The walk up these streets and neighbourhood was sensory overload.. this is what Japan was all about, this is exactly what I wanted to see and feel .. im so lucky to be here right now, but at the same time it feels so right and part of my destiny. The whole jounrey ive been on, from feeling the confidence in being enlightened to myself, I still feel there is so much more depth, and I am begining to rip my face off again, the lust for personal possessions is drifting furter away, ive already given half of the crap I brought with me, and I will do so even more so till im satisfied.

So a couple wrong turns here and there, and next thing I noticed I was there! Walking into the cafe I was greeted by one of the most beautifull woman ive ever seen and her parents, they kindly invited me inside their lovely cafe, we sat for a few minutes, and I decided to walk around for a few minutes before the sun went down. I cant wait for the chance to see these places during the day, the temples here.. are just unbelivable, im delaying the post for this so I can put the pictures btw.
and I only walked around 2 blocks!!

I came back to the cafe shorlty after I set out, and Mayumi san suggested I goto the Japanese Baths and directed me right to it. At first I was a little surprised to see a woman right at the front with all the people around, but I think its just a little more open here the nudity in some regards. but regardless it was an experience, you start off by cleaning yourself with soap thoroughly in bucket baths of hot water, and then theres a series of 4 tubs, warm with bubbles is the first tub, and secondly is an electric shock one, which I was only in there for a few min, very intersting sensation!! and then it got hotter as it goes on, and then there is a cold tub which was clutch! In there I met 2 American doods 1 of them was actually staying with me at the cafe and the other was a fellow traveller, who had plans to join us for the travellers meal tonite at the Yoan Cafe. We cleaned up and made our way back to home.

So we were upstairs just chatting and also met one of the other travellers staying here, Nala a very lovely girl from Finland who has been studying Japanese language in Osaka and been here a couple of days. ‘can come down stairs now’ we heard from the bottom floor in a beautifull voice. What an amazing site,(i was in shock else I would have taken a picture) of the table arrangement, just wow, tonite we were going to be eating our own hand rolled sushi, there was a platter of assorted fish, all fresh, and also live octopus!!! (which was my favourite!!) and a big bowl of rice, and some mushrooms with mountain potatoe, and a very unique spinach salad ive never tasted before.

Ikadaimass !! I said out and we started, Mayumi San showed us how easy it was to roll one up, and it was!! I think all those times of rollin ls backz0rz kinda helped a bit but it was amazing!! my first 2 sucked, but i was doing them perfect for the next 100 rolls hehe wow this was honestly the best meal ive ever had in my life! everything so fresh, and nice the tea to go with was just perfect aswell. there was Salmon, Tuna, Crab, Octopus, and a couple other local fishes here I forget the names of. More importantly besides the food was the company, what an amazing opportunity to meet some of most intersting and beautifull people in the world! we talked and talked and ate and ate, seated at the floor level, what an experience. its been real pleasure to be here so far and its just getting started!! Soon after dinner a good friend of Mayumi san came over to visit, omg what a kool guy!! he reminded me of Gai sensei!! very funny and pleasent to talk he sat with us for some time.

So im just like chilling with Dave now on our beds and we’ll see what gets up to 2morrow not sure if our plans align but the day has yet to be seen.

Just getting back to the inner city life in AUS, spent the last 2 days at a rave deep in the bush, and .. just wow. Not only was the venue one of the most amazing places ive ever been to, but the crowd was just wikkid!!! it was smaller more intimate, and had the kinda vibe that everyone knows everyone.

I know my path as a warrior is ultimately to walk alone here, but the love in my heart makes me miss some of the magical people that have come across my life. Everyone comes into my life for a reason, and the energy that they eminate has a strong connection with me regardless, and experiencing that connection if only for a short time makes me realize how many wonderfull people and things there are in this world.

We set up our campsite some time on Saturday afternoon, and met some of our neighbours in the area, and settled into the grounds. I call this place dinosaur valley becuase the way it looked.. the trees, the raw earth, the way the hills looked reminded me of broncosaurus, well some of them anyways.

The biggest hill was North of our site and when it was approaching sundown I decided to climb it, and what a climb it was, taking my time and listening to the story of the trees as I ventured into the woods I was still in awe as I progressed. Finally reaching the top of the hill, the sudden sounds of branches breaking and footsteps startled me, it was a kangaroo!!!!! only a small one but still!! i just managed to catch a glimpse of it as it ran off, didn’t even have a chance to snap a few photos.

But as I moved onto the flat hill top, just wow. the view downwards into the valley was mainly blocked by the tall trees, but to the distance I could see clear and vividly deep into the valley, really amazing. Also the music … Psy Trance at its best very light and atmospheric to suit the time of the day, (can hear abit in one of my videos, msg me for a link) I stayed there in meditation for about an hour untill I could feel the suns energy leaving us for now., I watched the sun go down. and it was one of the most spectacular sunsets ive ever experienced, I could literally watch it moving as it set off past the tree tops on the far side. The time of sorcery was about to begin.

We raved that night .. and day, there was nothing like being on the earth surrounded by love, and energy , barefootThere were many faces that came across my path that night, and the energy is engrained within my heart. Jenatia, Hannie, Greg, Michelle .. some of their names. Hannie what a beautifull girl!!! I always love when people come up to me and talk to me, she said right away she loved the little line of hair I had under my lip.. something I came up with back then, and still carry. also how lovely my eyes were!! I love it when people feel the need to talk to me, and im sure she was happy also.

That night, we raved!!!! the energy waves from the sound form different ways inside me, trance .. its not drum and bass!! hehe the movements that I come up with are different yet beautifull in their own way, and it was amazing to experience the rave here. the different ways people move, the little sub-cultures that form here, it was pure hippy and there was so much love !!!

Nick .. The stars are different here!! so amazing, and so clear I couldnt get over it!!! I still wish I could go back to look at them some more! not that night, but that night me and Karryn curled up in our sleeping bags by the hot coals of the fire, and slept under the stars, what a beautifull sleep. we laughed and giggled for a while, untill sleep. John chose the car after the temperature began to drop.

I loved every minute while we were there.

I woke shortly before sun rise, and while it was still dark out it made the fire up. to me there has always been something magical about building a fire under the stars, and sitting there I spent hours in meditation, even just laying down beside the fire and looking at time. Some of my visions were magnificant that night, but that is another story.

Oh, so during the day there were many flies and were kind of annoying I discovered that when I stood by a tree that they would not come near me. and didnt think much of it, but that morning I was being harassed, and it just clicked to me that its because they are eculaptus trees! quickly i grabbed a nearby branch that had fallen, broke some of the leaves up and rubbed on my face and neck, stuffed the branches down my shirt so the leaves hung over my face and viola !! no more bug problems!! and i Looked soooo kool also (Sorry Nick forgot to snap a pic =/ i know.. i know)

That morning 2 warriors came across my path, Jimmy .. a native Aboriginal that has lost his path, and Nick a travelling companion of his. He shared with me tales of his travels in search of his roots, he walked with everything he owned in his bag, a few photos, and some other small items, he made his way all across Australia, he only gave me a glimpse of his face but it was enough.

amazing.. just finihsed watching naruto on the plane to aus, im crying still. but man looking out the window .. one of the most amazing sites ive ever see, this truly is the land of the rising sun, i been sneeking peeks every now and then while i was watching naruto but man.. the colours ive never seen before, the suns tint is bringing out the blues and hues, … just amazing, i could even see the stars when it was first creeping out, now its a little bit more lighter outside but still .. AUS time is 05:29, so 1h 30min to go!!!

im soo excited can’t belive it, im actually gonna stay with ladyk .. funny how we lost contact for couple of years, and was able to pick up back where we left off and also how warm and inviting she was allowing me to stay with her. Truly an amazing person, I really look forward to spending time with her and learning her story a little bit at a time while im there. Besides all the sites and adventures.

Just being in the airport i was all excited about japan, getting closer to AUS makes me all excited about that now!! being just above the clouds .. woowo i can see the formation and shapes so clearly now its a little more brighter. i slept about 4 hours tonight so not feeling that bad, when i woke up i knew i wasnt able to get back to sleep so perfect time to pull it out. ;0

–
Omar Samad

Well .. all good things. The time to leave here is nearing, but I just needed to say how beautifull this place is once again, went cycling today through the deep forests .. and wow, was just amazing. These trees had different stories, and taught me a great deal about this part of the earth while I was amoung them, im happy to have heard only a fraction of what they had to say but was lovely.

Its been so nice to see these people and Im still taking in all the kindness that has been bestowed upon me. It really touches my heart to be surrounded by so much love everywhere I go, and I wish I could do more, the girls today started crying when we saying good byes, but they gonna wake up early to see me off. they’re sooooooo adorable i’ll miss them loads.

The journey begins shortly, got a trek to Londontown before i fly away!! just gotta finish putting a few things away and i’ll be away!!

 love

02092007-canclub.wmv

Please watch this, I have been literally crying during and after watching this. I really am passionate about what is important to me in life, and when it comes to the earth .. and how we’re treating it, how we treat ourselves. we really are living in a world of self-deception. Most people have no idea why they do things, why they gravitate towards people, why they find themselves purchasing designer labels, purchasing other goods.. we really need very little , but people are unconciously wanting more and more.

Watching that video has really re-kindled a passion within me to take care of the earth, I am a firm beliver that although being only 1 person I can make a difference in the world. I can apply my conciousness and help shape people into becoming concious their selves, the ripple of positive energy that will eminate .. creates the awareness that we have a responsibility to protecting the earth, people are in this world of self-deception that everything is alright. but really it’s getting worse and worse, the time to act is now. and I hope that if you read this you start right now!! The first step is awareness, breaking the unconcious barrier that societies have imposed on us and free your mind.